Well I had some fun and games today. I woke up this morning to discover my internet connection was down. Naturally I assumed some kind of fault so went through the usual shenanigans of trying to fix it. I lost count of the number of times I turn off and on again!
Anyway I finally decided I had better contact someone to see if there was a fault. First port of call was to BT to see if there was a fault on the line. After the obligatory 20 mins trying to get to speak to someone they informed me that there was no problem their end but they could send an engineer out but that would cost me!! No thanks!!
Next I thought I would contact my Service provider, AOL. That proved somewhat difficult though. I couldn't find a telephone number for them anywhere! Everything I found gave an email address or a website....
How exactly are you supposed to contact them in this way when the reason you need to contact them is because you can't actually access the internet? Imbeciles!!
I rang a friend in the end to get them to look on AOL's website for a telephone number. Not an easy find I can tell you but there it was hidden away many pages deep into their site.
So I rang them and received the usual multi options of press 1 for such and such, press 2 for ... , press 23089 for an air strike to put you out of your misery!!
How do I know which button to press? I don't know what the problem is... That's why I'm ringing.
Anyway I finally got to speak to someone. They firstly tried to tell me that BT had disconnected my broadband capability! Had I not already spoken to them I would have accepted this, but I had! So I simply asked if they were sure. 10 seconds later after they had bothered to test the line they confirmed that it was fine!!
Next they told me their was a billing issue and they would have to transfer my call.... Yippee I love being transferred by call centres it's so much fun!
Eventually my call was answered again and the conversation went something like this.....
Nicholas: Hello my name is Nicholas how can I help you today?
Me: (Explained the situation and confirmed contact details)
Nicholas: Hello my name is Nicholas (again!). Mr 70K you have not paid your last invoice and so your service has been barred.
Me: Not paid? I've been with you for 7 years and never been late with a payment, how can this be?
(then it dawned on me that my card was replaced in October and that may have caused a hiccup)
Nicholas: Mr 70K you have not paid your bill of £24.99 so the account has been suspended.
Me: You told me that. Why haven't you contacted me to sort this out and I would have corrected the details as last time my card was renewed it updated automatically?
Nicholas: Mr 70K we have millions of customers we cannot be expected to contact them.
Me: Is it not AOL's policy to provide any level of customer service then?
Nicholas: Mr 70K it is an automated process. If you do not pay the service is switched off.
Me: Can you give an answer that isn't written on the screen in front of you?
Nicholas: Mr 70K How would you like to pay the outstanding balance in a one off payment?
Me: I'll take that as a no!! (gave my card details). How long will it be before my connection is back up and running?
Nicholas: Mr 70K your payment has been processed.
Me: HOW LONG WILL IT BE BEFORE MY CONNECTION IS BACK UP AND RUNNING?
Nicholas: It can take BT up to 28 days to restore the connection.
Me: WHAT? There is no problem with BT what are you on about? Turn my connection back on NOW!!!
Nicholas: Mr 70K, let me check your line..... Mr 70k there is no problem with your line.
Me: I KNOW!!! When will my internet connection be back on.
Nicholas: Mr 70K your connection will take 4 to 5 hours to be reinstated.
Me: What time is it now?
Nicholas: How would you like to set up your mandate to pay your next payment?
Me: What time is it now?
Nicholas: Mr 70K I can not give you a precise time. How would you like to set up your mandate for future payments?
Me: I don't! If this is how you treat customers I will decide between now an the next billing date whether or not to change service providers.
Nicholas: Mr 70K if your payment is not made on the due date your service will be disconnected.
Me: Are AOL bothered about customer retention?
Nicholas: Is there anything else I can help you with today?
Me: Yes. (silence)
Nicholas: Mr 70K are you there?
Me: Yes
Long pause.......
Nicholas: Mr 70K is there anything else I can help you with today?
Me: Yes.
Longer pause....
Nicholas: Mr 70K?
Me: Yes.
Nicholas: Is there anything else I can help you with today?
Me: Yes
Nicholas: I do not understand Mr 70K. Please repeat the question.
Me: I didn't ask a question.
Nicholas: Errrm. Mr 70K is there anything else I can help you with today?
Me: Until I say no you can't end the call can you?
Pause.....
Nicholas: Mr 70k Is there anything else I can help you with today?
Me: Yes
Nicholas: What can help you with?
Me: Do you know if the Merseyside Derby will be Overs?
Long pause....
Nicholas: Mr 70K for calls relating to telephone queries I would have to transfer you to a different department would you like me to connect you?
Me: Are you just reading random answers off your screen now?
Nicholas: I do not understand Mr 70K. Please repeat the question.
Me: No
Nicholas: Mr 70K is there anything else I can help you with today?
Me: Ok I'll let you go now I've wasted enough of your time to feel a little satisfied for the time I've wasted. Be sure to check out my blog won't you!
Nicholas: Thankyou for your call today. We are glad to be of service.
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHA! F@*k Off!!!
Clunk!!!!!
The call ended at 12:25. Back on at 16:45!! At least they got that right :-(
Anyone know of any good Broadband packages out there?
To top it all I see that Djokovic won in straight sets which I would have had a bet on!! Thankyou AOL you may have cost me over a grand!!
Here we have the match up of two players that are so different yet both seem to perform well indoors. Firstly we have Davydenko who never quite seems to fulfil his obvious talents, which leads to concerns over his true motivation for a win to be the outcome of certain matches! Davydenko has a great all court game and so much more ability than his opponent today.
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