Danka Kovinic v Anna Karolina Schmiedlova

Scmiedlova leading 2-5* 30-15 in the 3rd when I get on at 1.01.

Eyes on the ball

FFS 30-40... Break!!! NEVER BACK 1.01

3*-5 15-40 TAKE IT!!! Grrrrr 30-40... 2nd serve... FFS Deuce... 2nd... GP... 2nd (not that it makes any difference) ... Ooooh Deuce... MP#3... 2nd serve... Looks like a retard and plays like a retard! Deuce... GP#2... Ace!! Dear God!

4-5*0-15... I love laying 1.01's Oh wait, what's that I backed it? N'ah surely not! 15-15... 30-15... 2nd... 30-30... 2nd... Shot! 40-30... Deuce... MP#5... 2nd... Oh my Lordy. In all my years I don't think I've seen a serve go so wide it goes straight in the stand! Double Fault Deuce... MP#6... FFS Schmiedlova punish the mooballs not tee them up for her! Deuce... MP#7 Lucky 7? C'mon mong face TAKE IT!!! Deuce... 2nd... Double Fault! BP... Point! Deuce... That was long! Challenge it No wtf useless! BP#2... Deuce... Shes fallen over but it's in! MP#8...

GSM! Never in doubt! 1.01's are FREE MUNNIES!

Profit: A whopping £0.90

Flavia Pennetta v Monica Nicelescu

Penne Pasta is leading 6-1 3*-2 when I get on at 1.04

Ok I know it's spaghetti!

Pennetta holds from Deuce 4-2*

5*-2 A break to love. Now to serve it out.

2 MP's wasted now BP!!! Women! Deuce... BP#2... Deuce... MP#3 Take it! ... Pffft Deuce... BP#3... FFS Break!

5-3* Holds from Deuce.

5*-4 This time then Flavia. 0-15... 0-30... 15-30... 30-30... 30-40 WTF? Deuce... MP#4... GSM Made me sweat there!


Profit: £3.48

Football: O'Higgins v Univ de Concepcion

Going for Over 1.5 Goals @ 1.23 in this one.

Let's have the goals to make this girl happy!

God I hate goals betting... 30 minutes gone and it's 0-0.

HT and still 0-0 may have picked a lemon here! However 7 shots on target in the 1st half I feel we may yet still have the goals.

Booom!!! Less than a minute in to the 2nd half and it's 0-1. Surprised the away team have taken the lead. Must have been an inspirational team talk!

Boom Boom!!! 51 minutes and it's 0-2.

Profit: £16.42
Bank: £91.16